Family members and addiction: Why can't they just say no?
When addiction strikes a family member, the whole family system is affected. Finding solutions can be a trying, gut-wrenching ordeal, testing the best of families.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Utah leads nation...
KSL news just reported that Utah leads nation in pain killer deaths.
"A new study shows that painkiller abuse has not only reached epidemic levels in the United States, but overdose deaths continue a disturbing rise.
And Utah is among the top states leading the nation in deaths."
I wish I knew how to help those family members who have someone they love who is abusing these drugs or any drugs for that matter. Believe me having family members who abused and died and are still it is not easy! Don't think for one moment that you as the abuser is only hurting yourself. THAT IS NOT TRUE.
Well after taking 6 months off from writing on this blog I am back. I saw this news article on the news and thought I really need to get back to writing on this blog. Why? I really don't know why.
After Zack's death this blog was a way for me to come and let my feelings out and try and help get the word out about the huge problem prescription drug abuse is in Utah and the nation. For the first few month after his death the family was gung hoe about starting this foundation and getting involved with different groups, but because of a lack of understanding, poor communication, frustrations, anger, and lack of motivation among other things this is it, a blog that I have not visited or wrote on in 6 months.
Until I read this article and saw it on the news, I had put the whole prescription drug problem out of my head. I enjoyed a great summer with my family. I decided after some research and counselling that I wanted to surround my family and I with people who didn't take so much from me emotionally. We didn't visit Idaho and haven't for almost a year as I was not emotionally ready to deal with the drama that is there. I don't know that I am still ready?
"A new study shows that painkiller abuse has not only reached epidemic levels in the United States, but overdose deaths continue a disturbing rise.
And Utah is among the top states leading the nation in deaths."
I wish I knew how to help those family members who have someone they love who is abusing these drugs or any drugs for that matter. Believe me having family members who abused and died and are still it is not easy! Don't think for one moment that you as the abuser is only hurting yourself. THAT IS NOT TRUE.
Well after taking 6 months off from writing on this blog I am back. I saw this news article on the news and thought I really need to get back to writing on this blog. Why? I really don't know why.
After Zack's death this blog was a way for me to come and let my feelings out and try and help get the word out about the huge problem prescription drug abuse is in Utah and the nation. For the first few month after his death the family was gung hoe about starting this foundation and getting involved with different groups, but because of a lack of understanding, poor communication, frustrations, anger, and lack of motivation among other things this is it, a blog that I have not visited or wrote on in 6 months.
Until I read this article and saw it on the news, I had put the whole prescription drug problem out of my head. I enjoyed a great summer with my family. I decided after some research and counselling that I wanted to surround my family and I with people who didn't take so much from me emotionally. We didn't visit Idaho and haven't for almost a year as I was not emotionally ready to deal with the drama that is there. I don't know that I am still ready?
Friday, May 20, 2011
Elder M. Russell Ballard
Elder M. Russell Ballard interview on Drug Addiction. Also his General Conference talk on Addition given in October of 2010.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
ASTONISHING...
"ASTONISHING
That's all I can say. Astonishing that my children are now more likely to die from prescription drug overdose that from a car accident, the former number one cause of death in their age group."
(David F. Cole, MD, Utah Medical Assoc. Bulliten, March 2011)
Confession of a prescription drug addict:
"I would look in peoples' medicine cabinets when I was using. I wanted to see what they had."
"I would look in peoples' medicine cabinets when I was using. I wanted to see what they had."
Please if you have unused or expired prescription drugs please take them to the Utah County Take Back Event on April 30th
UTAH COUNTY TACK BACK EVENT INFORMATION:
HOURS: 10-2 Saturday April 30, 2011
1. Saratoga Springs Walgreens, 1410 N. Redwood Rd
2. Lehi Fresh Market, 760 East Main Street
3. American Fork Fresh Market, 135 E. Main Street
4. Pleasant Grove Macey's, 931 W. State
5. Lindon Walker's C-Store- 25 South State
6. Orem Macey's, 880 North State Street
7. Provo Macey's, 1400 North State
8. Springville City Civic Center, 110 S. Main Street
9. Spanish Fork Maceys, 187 E. 100 N
10. N. Payson Walgreens 132 N. Main
11. Woodland Hills, 5 S. Woodland Hills (By the mailboxes)
Saturday, April 16, 2011
UTAH COUNTY TACK BACK PRESCRIPTION DRUG EVENT!!
*************************************************
UTAH COUNTY TACK BACK EVENT INFORMATION:
HOURS: 10-2 Saturday April 30, 2011
1. Saratoga Springs Walgreens, 1410 N. Redwood Rd
2. Lehi Fresh Market, 760 East Main Street
3. American Fork Fresh Market, 135 E. Main Street
4. Pleasant Grove Macey's, 931 W. State
5. Lindon Walker's C-Store- 25 South State
6. Orem Macey's, 880 North State Street
7. Provo Macey's, 1400 North State
8. Springville City Civic Center, 110 S. Main Street
9. Spanish Fork Maceys, 187 E. 100 N
10. N. Payson Walgreens 132 N. Main
11. Woodland Hills, 5 S. Woodland Hills (By the mailboxes)
Use Only As Directed
www.useonlyasdirected.org
UTAH COUNTY TACK BACK EVENT INFORMATION:
HOURS: 10-2 Saturday April 30, 2011
1. Saratoga Springs Walgreens, 1410 N. Redwood Rd
2. Lehi Fresh Market, 760 East Main Street
3. American Fork Fresh Market, 135 E. Main Street
4. Pleasant Grove Macey's, 931 W. State
5. Lindon Walker's C-Store- 25 South State
6. Orem Macey's, 880 North State Street
7. Provo Macey's, 1400 North State
8. Springville City Civic Center, 110 S. Main Street
9. Spanish Fork Maceys, 187 E. 100 N
10. N. Payson Walgreens 132 N. Main
11. Woodland Hills, 5 S. Woodland Hills (By the mailboxes)
Use Only As Directed
www.useonlyasdirected.org
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Part 3...
Rock's mom reminded me that he had over 20 strokes and 2 heart attacks during his overdose and coma. Really I think his mom would be more adequet to tell his story as she was with him during it but I have tried to do my best. He was in therapy learning how to live again. Rock would go out side in the front lawn and practice his fly fishing casting over and over again to try and retrain him self how to do it. He is an avid fly fisherman. It took him about a year and then he was called on a service mission for the LDS church working at the Storehouse in Lindon.
Rock sometimes wonders why he was spared and is totally grateful that he was. He does not take a day he is alive for granted. He doesn't hold grudges towards anyone even if they have done him wrong or hurt his feelings in anyway. He smiles a lot and often people will comment on his smiling so much. He honestly looks at the positive in all situations. He reminds me daily to be grateful for this life I am living despite the trials that we face.
But I am also reminded that just because his life was spared doesn't mean he hasn't reaped the consequences of his past decisions to abuse perscription drugs. Every decision comes with consequences. He still struggles with short term memory loss. I know we all have those moments of forgetfulness but this goes beyond that. It can be frustrating to a wife. It has also been a financial burden with all his past decision that have caused financial obligations that weren't taken care of before his coma. These have come back and we now have to take care of them while trying to raise and provide for a family.
I did not know Rock before his coma or after while going through therapy. I have seen pictures that Rock didn't want me to see and I was shocked. He was on death's door. But still I haven't seen the progress. People point it out to me all the time how far he has come. I guess I just expect too much from him. I don't realize sometimes his limitations, but to be honest I think he is slowly overcoming all his limitations!
I am grateful that Rock was spared. He is a great father and husband. Our first date he was completely honest with me about his drug use, coma, limitations, etc. and to be honest I was a little hesitant about a second date. With out going into too much detail it was the help of my Heavenly Father after many prayers and months of soul searching that help me reach the decision to marry Rock. It hasn't been easy and I have learned that I made the decision to marry him and with that I agreed to all the happiness I can have with him. But that happiness is laced with trials and hard times. Rock never hid who he was and what he did in his past which I appreciated but after saying "I DO" things came up that neither he or I expected, but it has just helped our relationship.
He has had many wonderful friends and family who support him and our family!
Rock sometimes wonders why he was spared and is totally grateful that he was. He does not take a day he is alive for granted. He doesn't hold grudges towards anyone even if they have done him wrong or hurt his feelings in anyway. He smiles a lot and often people will comment on his smiling so much. He honestly looks at the positive in all situations. He reminds me daily to be grateful for this life I am living despite the trials that we face.
But I am also reminded that just because his life was spared doesn't mean he hasn't reaped the consequences of his past decisions to abuse perscription drugs. Every decision comes with consequences. He still struggles with short term memory loss. I know we all have those moments of forgetfulness but this goes beyond that. It can be frustrating to a wife. It has also been a financial burden with all his past decision that have caused financial obligations that weren't taken care of before his coma. These have come back and we now have to take care of them while trying to raise and provide for a family.
I did not know Rock before his coma or after while going through therapy. I have seen pictures that Rock didn't want me to see and I was shocked. He was on death's door. But still I haven't seen the progress. People point it out to me all the time how far he has come. I guess I just expect too much from him. I don't realize sometimes his limitations, but to be honest I think he is slowly overcoming all his limitations!
I am grateful that Rock was spared. He is a great father and husband. Our first date he was completely honest with me about his drug use, coma, limitations, etc. and to be honest I was a little hesitant about a second date. With out going into too much detail it was the help of my Heavenly Father after many prayers and months of soul searching that help me reach the decision to marry Rock. It hasn't been easy and I have learned that I made the decision to marry him and with that I agreed to all the happiness I can have with him. But that happiness is laced with trials and hard times. Rock never hid who he was and what he did in his past which I appreciated but after saying "I DO" things came up that neither he or I expected, but it has just helped our relationship.
He has had many wonderful friends and family who support him and our family!
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Part 2...An Overdose and Coma that saved Rock's Life!
Rock described his body going through hell as..."someone trying to rip my brains out of my head. Your body hurts all over and you sweat and shake like crazy. You feel like you are going to die."
This is coming down or the process of coming off the drugs. Rock has experience this a couple of times but he only has told me of the time he was in jail for 6 weeks. When you feel your body going into that "Hell" state you will do anything to get your drug so you can feel good again. In jail Rock couldn't get that fix he needed so he was forced in a sense to come clean. But after jail it was back to his family and to his old way of life. He was clean for a few weeks while in jail, but he came home to family members and friends who abused and they were right there offering him some more pills so they could go and get high together. Rock made the choice to abuse again. Rock's "normal state of being or existing" was when he was high on prescription drugs. This is what he called his life now ~ an addict.
Rock is what they call a high functioning addict. He still worked, he had a job but he functioned only on the pills.
Disclaimer: My opinion is that when some, not all addicts come out of rehab or jail after they have detoxed and go back to their old environment with friends using, family members using and back to a place where they feel more comfortable they are more likely to start abusing again.
Peer Pressure~ Rock admits he gave into peer pressure and in turn pressured others to do drugs with him.
I am not sure of the exact date Rock's overdose happened, as he doesn't even remember. Sometimes he tells me it was in January of 2004, some of his family members say it was around Christmas 2003, so I am not sure the exact date his overdose happen or all the details. He told me he took some So ma's and took a lot of them. He was with his buddy riding up the canyon I think and they were high or going to go get high. Again not sure all the details of the story and honestly neither does Rock. He just knew he took more so ma's then he normally would. His friend brought him to his parents house. I guess they thought he was just passed out so they layed him on the couch. I really am not sure what happened between that time and the time he was taken to the hospital in a coma for days. Some say 4 days, some say 5 days, not really sure but he was in a coma.
Some addicts have to hit rock bottom before they realize they need to change their behaviors. I believe if you take away the "rock bottom" or the consequences of the addicts actions you are doing them a dis-service. (See LDS Service Meeting)
Rock's "rock bottom" was his coma. He became a vegetable. He had to learn to walk, talk, read, write, eat, go to the bathroom, get dress, etc all over again. Today he is lucky to be a live.
This is coming down or the process of coming off the drugs. Rock has experience this a couple of times but he only has told me of the time he was in jail for 6 weeks. When you feel your body going into that "Hell" state you will do anything to get your drug so you can feel good again. In jail Rock couldn't get that fix he needed so he was forced in a sense to come clean. But after jail it was back to his family and to his old way of life. He was clean for a few weeks while in jail, but he came home to family members and friends who abused and they were right there offering him some more pills so they could go and get high together. Rock made the choice to abuse again. Rock's "normal state of being or existing" was when he was high on prescription drugs. This is what he called his life now ~ an addict.
Rock is what they call a high functioning addict. He still worked, he had a job but he functioned only on the pills.
Disclaimer: My opinion is that when some, not all addicts come out of rehab or jail after they have detoxed and go back to their old environment with friends using, family members using and back to a place where they feel more comfortable they are more likely to start abusing again.
Peer Pressure~ Rock admits he gave into peer pressure and in turn pressured others to do drugs with him.
I am not sure of the exact date Rock's overdose happened, as he doesn't even remember. Sometimes he tells me it was in January of 2004, some of his family members say it was around Christmas 2003, so I am not sure the exact date his overdose happen or all the details. He told me he took some So ma's and took a lot of them. He was with his buddy riding up the canyon I think and they were high or going to go get high. Again not sure all the details of the story and honestly neither does Rock. He just knew he took more so ma's then he normally would. His friend brought him to his parents house. I guess they thought he was just passed out so they layed him on the couch. I really am not sure what happened between that time and the time he was taken to the hospital in a coma for days. Some say 4 days, some say 5 days, not really sure but he was in a coma.
Some addicts have to hit rock bottom before they realize they need to change their behaviors. I believe if you take away the "rock bottom" or the consequences of the addicts actions you are doing them a dis-service. (See LDS Service Meeting)
Rock's "rock bottom" was his coma. He became a vegetable. He had to learn to walk, talk, read, write, eat, go to the bathroom, get dress, etc all over again. Today he is lucky to be a live.
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